A disability can feel vastly different depending on the person, the type of disability, the symptoms, and the community surrounding the person with the disability. Here’s some examples from my experiences.

I’m just gonna throw that one out there. It’s not fair that I can’t work (much) or that I’m too tired to do normal things like go to the zoo without a ton of stopping to rest (and I should be using a mobility aid in that situation).

I know I never would have written about disabilities and worked with so many people with disabilities if I didn’t have them myself. Also, I love learning about genetics, and I’ve studied my albinism by the hour. When I feel well, I’m inspired to learn more about my disabilities.

Sometimes I don’t know how to talk about a disability that I have because I haven’t shared it too much. Or sometimes the symptoms of a disability are embarrassing. I feel embarrassed when I can’t read my piano students’ music because of my visual impairments. I feel embarrassed when I think of using a wheelchair at Walmart even though I’m sure almost no one else would care.

… Not to mention I literally have Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. 😆 But it’s more than that. If my depression is bad sometime, I feel way more tired. It’s a heavy exhaustion that I can’t shake off. Or having to advocate for myself when doctors, one after another, won’t listen to me–that’s exhausting, too, and happens quite often unfortunately.

I know some people in the albinism community, and I’m on Facebook groups with a few disability communities, and sometimes I see the beauty in a disability, such as having such blonde hair from having a lack of pigment. It’s really a different sort of beauty. Or the person I’ve become because of my disabilities is a beautiful person. Validation from myself and others really helps with feeling special.

Disabilities feel confusing.

For me, especially mental illnesses feel confusing. My autism gets confused during conversations. My borderline and OCD get riled up and I don’t know why they can’t settle down. Sometimes depression sinks in and anxiety takes over for seemingly no reason! I wish I understood things better, yet I know I do have personal insight.

There’s a glimpse into my life! Please comment what you think or what topics you’d like me to write about in the future! Thanks so much for reading! I appreciate you!!!