Pain is something I never discuss. I don’t need to wallow in something that will not change. Pain- is a “something” because I rarely discuss it with those I love. I little, let the word leave my mouth. Unless and only if I feel like a stiff grandmother with a cranky attitude because my insides feel as though I’m being burned with a frying pan. In which case, I simply tell myself, “Get out of bed”.
The way in which the mind works fascinates me. Momentum then changes my outlook. I feel the same way every, single, day. In order to be successful, I keep a mental checklist. I start with rising from bed, having a chat with my mom over coffee. Proceeding to make lunch, doing some type of physical activity no matter how simple. Working for the good of others and not myself. It is within that space I grant myself peace and humble myself in immense gratitude.
These tips lay alongside the education of Psychology and the Kubler Ross model of Greif. I Deny my diagnosis in front of those I love; often putting aside my Anger towards the activities I can’t do. Bargaining if I strain in one area the neuromuscular disorder, CP faults another area of my life. Commonly, Sleep!!!!! Following that we meet our friend Depression. Then I begin again at Accepting my truth.
My truth; I am a daughter, a sibling, a scholar, an advocate, a dog mom, a lover of the arts, and most importantly a survivor of chronic pain. But I like to be perceived by those first qualities instead of the last.